How to fight loneliness and stay a winner

Contents:

• Loneliness: Pros and Cons
• You are alone?
• Wrong ways to escape from loneliness
• Loneliness: how to fight it?

What is loneliness? Internet tells us that it is a special psychological state of the person associated with the absence of close emotional ties with others. Probably each of us at least once in their life felt lonely. Agree similar stage in a person's life is remembered with distaste, and at the least his approach once there is a desire to learn how to deal with loneliness. But is it really necessary? Let's try to sort out this problem.

Loneliness: Pros and Cons

"Loneliness - bastard ..." - sung in one of the infamous song. However, whether it is the truth? The last few centuries, people just do what they are trying to get rid of loneliness. Many are losing on this front, and all because initially the wrong approach to the issue.

In solitude has its advantages. However, in this case, psychologists prefer to call it by another name - "Solitude". We speculate on how to build our contact with the environment. Here, you have a need for you after a while realized. Then you have to choose from the environment object with which you satisfy yourself. After finding it, you merge with him in a moment in one. These can include as something material and about living people. Obviously, it is impossible to always be someone or something in contact. At a certain point he interrupted, and you need the time to digest the impressions received and experience. If this step was not, then the mind simply can not cope to with the information received.

In addition to the above-important function, loneliness has a number of other advantages:

• Time for yourself

  When you are dealing with a lot of other people, you can not do something for yourself. And how is it our favorite treatments are, reading, watching stupid TV series, and mass of such a pleasant nonsense? Taking all of this, we have a rest and get pleasant emotions.

• The ability to understand yourself

  The life is full of situations where we do not know what you want and what you need to do. Privacy creates a psychological space in which you have the chance to hear and understand ourselves. Agree, without it anywhere!

• freedom

  When you have no one connected, it gives you a huge space for freedom of action. You do not need to report to other people and their opinions taken into account when making decisions. You just do what you want, and you reach the desired goals.

Of course, all is not as rosy as we would like to think. Loneliness is not by chance that so many negative shades. He was particularly afraid of women - perhaps this is due to our high emotion and the need to communicate. Chances are, you already have are well aware of the shortcomings of loneliness, but we still list them:

• Harmful

  Recent studies have shown that there is a link between loneliness and the risk of various diseases. Along with alcohol, cigarettes and harmful fatty food, it depletes the human body and leads to psychosomatic disorders: diseases of the nerves, heart, stomach, etc. ...

• Deterioration of contact with the world

  Single person begins to suffer from distrust to everything around him. Often this is due to the fact that people find themselves alone after quarrels, betrayals and partings. High stress traumatize the human psyche, and after it is very difficult to recover.

• The effect of "infection"

  When your friend tells you about his loneliness, you may have it in tune with the state of feelings and experiences. In the end, each of us, to some degree alone, and when we come in contact with such people, this effect is enhanced.

• Imperceptible loneliness

  Very rarely people around you manage to notice that you are one. A lone man looks and behaves almost the same as everyone else, but inside he sat pain. This leads to a deterioration of the psychological state, and you experience a feeling that no one understands you.

You are alone?

Surely after reading all of the above, you are wondering how you are alone. Arriving home, you find yourself alone, and often this is accompanied by a sense of melancholy gray muddy covering all the space around you. TV and Cat become members of your family, and you will discern the voice of DJ's favorite radio station.

Naturally, your psychological state is far from ideal. You feel emptiness, sadness, and the word "happiness" can cause you a sad smile. Some single people are beginning to joke evil and poisonous, "flooding" sarcasm all the space around them.

Man experiencing loneliness, really want to sleep, but sleep can be a problem. It is not surprising, because it is not a lack of sleep, and that the bed - it's the only place that is still warm and cozy. In the apartment you feel uncomfortable - it prevents the void. Life begins to resemble Groundhog Day: all the same, and nothing new is happening.

At the same time you start to avoid people. Of course, because they can not understand what is happening to you. The strongest sign of loneliness - the feeling of being abandoned in a crowd of people or at a party. You may not want to remove sunglasses, even at night - what if someone sees your eyes?

Wrong ways to escape from loneliness

For anyone experiencing loneliness becomes incredibly painful ordeal. Tosca, emptiness, a feeling of lack of something important - all these things interfere with the privacy of a person to experience the full, forcing her to flee from aimlessly. The fear to remain with their own deficiency leads to various versions of the escape.

Women's escape from loneliness often takes the form of obsessive desire to get married. This leads to promiscuity in the choice of a partner, that certainly does not bode well. The charm of the period of courtship and the alluring prospect of a wedding ring on the ring finger of his right hand just do not give the woman to see discrepancies in values, outlook and views on family life. You dream of a cozy house with three children, and he - a world tour? What is the difference, because we love each other! All this ends up feeling deceived about. But to break up over the years is not so easy, and you continue to be a pair of nominally, while experiencing the feeling of loneliness in the family.

If the marriage does not work, you can try to be a part of any group or community. This creates a sense of belonging together and something important. This requirement is very fond of all sorts of unscrupulous people to use, for example, a sect whose membership leads to loss of self.

Thanks to the Internet, in the modern world, almost no one feels alone - rather, it is always possible to escape from loneliness in virtual reality. Social networks, forums, communities of interest - plenty of sites on the Internet for communication and bringing people together. However, therein lies its danger. The relationships that we build in reality, require us a significant amount of effort and the need to make compromises, and contain a large element of risk - what if I do not like, or leave me for someone better? Internet relationships in this regard is simpler and easier if something goes wrong, you can simply "remove" unwanted person from your friends list and to find a replacement. Yes and contact you, by and large, not a real person, and with their fantasies about him.

Loneliness: how to fight it?

Are there the right options on how to deal with loneliness? Actually, nothing is impossible for man. But, most of all, something you need to change, because the usual way of life, and has led you to a negative state. What to do?

1. Help those in need

   The world around you is full of suffering people who are less fortunate than you. Post to help them - the perfect cure for loneliness. Search the Internet your nearest animal shelter. Almost every town has a volunteer community involved through a variety of groups: orphans, cancer patients, the elderly, etc. ... Choose the cute to you and find out what the volunteers are interested the most. You will see that there is no better means of loneliness than help his neighbor!

2. Fight with distorted views of themselves and the world

   Your head is full of opinions and attitudes regarding everything that surrounds you. Perhaps some of them are directly or indirectly interfere with your experience in conjunction with the other person. For example, you have an idea about a suitable man to you, and all who are below this bar is automatically discarded. Maybe we should wait a little lower? Or you repeatedly "beat life," and you are now belligerent attitude toward the world. But people are not to blame for your tragedy! Try to open up and trust them. Yes, it suggests the possibility of emotional wounds, but without the "shell" you can stop being lonely.

3. Come out into the world

   It is not necessary to withdraw into themselves and thereby strengthen its loneliness. Visiting cultural events, chat with friends, work - all it involves you in real life and is a source of positive emotions, so necessary to you now.

4. Refer to the psychologist

   If your loneliness delayed and slowly turns into a black depression, it is not necessary to delay treatment to a specialist. It is possible that the reasons for this state lie deep in the psyche, and to understand them on their own can not do.

5. Try to see more positive in the people around you

   In the end, even the biggest monsters in the history of the world had its advantages: Stalin helped win World War II, and thanks to the work of scientists of the Third Reich medicine significantly jumped forward.

What conclusion can we draw from this article? In all need balance. With privacy fight is not worth it - a natural phase of contact with the world, necessary for processing the experience. But if it takes more than you need, a part of your life and turns into an oppressive solitude, then this should work. Remember that everything is in your hands, and you can be happy, if you want this good!

We strongly recommend to read: The problem of loneliness of elderly people

How to get rid of panic attacks quickly and permanently

Contents:

• What are panic attacks
• How do I know what a panic attack and its symptoms
• Causes panic attacks
• Four ways to get rid of panic attacks

Do you feel at times as if mad, losing control of himself? Or do you have a feeling that is about to begin a heart attack? And can you say someone from the family that you are likely to begin some serious mental illness? Relax and do not worry: chances are you just experiencing bouts of panic attacks. To understand his condition, let alone know how most of these you can get rid of panic attacks, we must first understand what it is all about and what are the symptoms of these attacks.

What are panic attacks

Panic attacks can be defined as a sudden episodes of intense fear, the most acute phase which lasts for one minute. And they themselves bouts of panic attacks can last from a few seconds to an hour. Sometimes there is a cyclic series of successive attacks that last for several hours. Fear often bordering on terror, usually accompanied by unpleasant bodily sensations, difficulty thinking and a sense of impending disaster that can be expressed in the words: "Something terrible is happening to me! "" I am in great danger. "

Most painful is itself waiting for the onset of attacks, if people have already experienced them before, and understands that the panic will come back to him. Some of the panic attacks are totally unexpected, as if they had come out of nowhere, and some occur regularly provoked it was their expectation. Experiencing panic attacks say that this is the most intense feeling, which was the most unpleasant experience, and in their lives, and getting rid of the attacks would be for them the most desirable event.

How do I know what a panic attack and its symptoms

People suffering from bouts of panic attacks, often complain of a very strong fear and feeling as if they are dying or going crazy, or have a heart attack. They feel a strong weakness or nausea, shortness of breath, lose control of himself. All these feelings can cause a strong desire to escape, to leave the place where the attack began, as if it could save them from danger.

Factors causing offensive attacks can be many, but every time they start suddenly; you can never tell in advance that a person starts to panic. Needless disorder can be of two types: spontaneous and situational attacks. Spontaneous panic attacks are usually not associated with any specific stimuli and can begin even during sleep or a quiet, relaxing holiday. Offensive situational attacks provoked, as you can tell from the name, certain things or situations in which a person has previously had a strong fear.

Here are the common symptoms, which in varying combinations person experiences upon the occurrence of panic attacks:

• Strong and palpitations;
• Sweating;
• Shivers;
• Hot flashes or chills;
• Shortness of breath, or feeling short of breath;
• Pain or discomfort in the chest;
• The feeling of suffocation;
• Vomiting;
• Stomach upset;
• Dizziness;
• Tingling or numbness in the extremities;
• Dry mouth;
• Headache;
• The feeling of unreality, a sense of separation from the man himself.

The symptoms that people experience during panic attacks, causing them related fears. They do not realize that the reason the actual panic attack; some of them fear that losing control, and who, it seems that going to faint, stop navigate in the real world, or die from a heart attack. How to deal with these fears?

The threat of losing control

During a panic attack, people often feel that they are out of their own control. They are afraid that they will lose control of their physiological functions of the body and it leads to all sorts of trouble, or that they will lose control over their actions. Most of all, they fear that this could happen to them in the presence of other people in any public place, making them much embarrass.

If you too possessed such fear, try to relax and not to panic attack symptoms go so far .  It's only your belief, which is born in the depths of your consciousness .  In fact, the effect of panic attacks may not apply to your ability to self-control .  On the part it may not even be noticeable that you are having such severe discomfort and panic if caught you in a public place, the people around you do not even notice .  Be sure - you will not shout or jump up when you are in a meeting and not to throw under the car, when you go down the street .  Even if there will any slight awkward situation, learn to say to yourself, "So what? Just think, what nonsense! "Be forgiving and kind to yourself .  The more you turn to face your fears, the less pressure you on render .  And the more the chances are high that you can get rid of panic attacks .

The threat of loss of consciousness

Because of dizziness and feeling short of breath during a panic, you may experience the fear that lose consciousness. Are you afraid that you will be particularly vulnerable at this point, especially when next to you is unoccupied. Fear faint and never recover generates horrible feeling. In addition, if you are among strangers, for example, on the street or in public transport, you can still experience and due to the fact that you steal money or you will lose important documents.

You have to understand that usually fainting is caused by insufficient intake of blood to the brain, and with it the oxygen. But during a panic attack always starts palpitations, and this causes the blood pulsing faster. Therefore, the brain gets an ample amount of oxygen. A dizzy during panic attack is caused by rapid breathing, which in itself does not cause fainting. Realizing this, you will begin to get rid of the fear of losing consciousness.

The threat of a heart attack

This is another common fear that is characteristic of many people, even those who do not experience panic attacks. And those who suffer from this disorder, subject to the fear of a heart attack very often. These people are afraid that their heart is dependent on the said disorder, and in critical situations it will give a serious crash. To get rid of this fear, you need to understand what heart attacks are different from panic attacks.

Symptoms of a heart attack include shortness of breath and severe pain in the chest, sometimes accompanied by palpitations, and / or loss of consciousness. Such symptoms in humans with heart disease aggravated by physical effort. The higher the load, the more pronounced symptoms. A dormant discomfort in the heart region disappear. During the panic attack symptoms occur at rest, and they disappear only when a person ceases to feel fear. Moreover, heart disease cause some changes in the electrical impulses of the heart, which can be seen on an electrocardiogram, whereas during a panic attack cardiogram shows only an increase in heart rate.

People prone to panic attacks, all too often totally unreasonable worried about his heart. They become overly vigilant and begin to listen to the constant feeling in the chest, constantly checked at a pulse, make sure that the heart has not stopped beating. Minor arrhythmias perceived as ominous harbingers of a possible cardiac arrest, and thus they do not take into account the fact that the heart always beats differently, if we do something excited or frightened.

If you too are still worried, will not happen if you have a heart attack, you will help to calm down a little examination. Make an electrocardiogram, to get rid of doubts. And if you are having symptoms similar to a heart attack at any time, not just during exercise, and a doctor confirms that your cardiogram showed no abnormalities, then rest assured - a manifestation of panic attacks and not a violation of cardiac activity!

Threat to get crazy

Many mention the unpleasant conditions associated with a sense of unreality. They are afraid of this feeling because they believe that slowly begin to go crazy. People who experience panic attacks, begins in these moments to feel that they are disconnected from the real world. They fear that their brains have been damaged, which is why it creates such sensations.

We want to reassure you. The feeling of detachment from reality during a panic attack cause excessive stress. As soon as you relax and give yourself to relax your body, these unpleasant sensations just dissipate, and your brain will work as usual, and the mind is clear and not confused. Therefore, do not worry nothing and live a quiet life, that will only speed up getting rid of all the discomfort.

All the "attendant" panic attacks fear caused by the fact that people do not understand why is happening to them is something unusual. This is really very important - to understand your body and what it feels to free themselves from the senseless anxiety that gives rise to your imagination. Now that you know more about the differences between the state of the disease and panic attacks, and when you understand what is going on in your body during a panic attack, you will feel more confident and be able to relax more quickly during the attack.

Causes panic attacks

To continue to successfully deal with a state of panic, it is necessary to understand the causes of its occurrence. What, then, are they?

• Long-term, predisposing causes - genetics. It was found that the panic disorder observed in families and this may mean that inheritance plays an important role in the predisposition to panic attacks. For example, studies conducted with twins, have shown that if one twin suffers from an anxiety disorder, some of the thirty-one to eighty-eight percent of the second twin also complain of the disorder. However, many of those who do not have "family" the history of this disease, it is still developing.
• Biological causes - obsessive-compulsive disorder, posttraumatic stress disorder, hypoglycemia, hyperthyroidism, Wilson's disease, mitral valve prolapse, pheochromocytoma, and inflammation of the inner ear (labyrinthitis): all diseases that can trigger the development of anxiety disorders. Also, "trigger" an alarm can serve as a vitamin deficiency due to an unbalanced diet.
• Phobias - people often experience panic attacks as a result of exposure to the phobic object or situation.
• Short reason - significant personal losses, including the gap emotional romantic attachment between the partners, major life changes, and the abuse of stimulants such as caffeine and nicotine.
• Lack of self-confidence - the growing body of evidence confirms the assertion of experts that those people who suffer from panic attacks, often prefer a passive style of communication and interaction with others.
• Medications - sometimes panic attacks may be a side effect of medication, such as Ritalin (methylphenidate) or even fluoroquinolone antibiotics. This may be a temporary side effect, which occurs when a patient is just starting treatment or this condition persists even when the patient is already accustomed to the drug. In this case, you must report your doctor increased anxiety, which will select the other drug.
• Alcohol or withdrawal of certain drugs - various substances can cause panic attacks and withdrawal (in other words, a hangover), as a rule, is always accompanied by increased anxiety.
• Hyperventilation syndrome - deep breathing deeply may cause hyperventilation when disturbed ratio of carbon and oxygen in human blood. Hyperventilation syndrome can cause respiratory alkalosis and hypocapnia - a condition which is characterized by heart palpitations and dizziness. Man takes these symptoms as a sign of an impending panic attack that actually provokes his next attack.
• Situation-related panic attacks - linking certain situations to panic attacks. If a person once survived an attack under certain circumstances, then he can develop cognitive (behavioral) predisposition to to relive the attack in such circumstances. This is one of the classic causes of panic attacks.
• Pharmacological factors - some chemicals (mainly stimulants, but here can be attributed to certain antidepressants) can either react with other medications, either alone provoke a panic attack, or even panic disorder. Some suffer from panic attacks also report phobias of specific drugs or chemicals; you can only talk about the psychosomatic effect.
• Chronic and severe diseases. This is particularly true of certain diseases of the heart, which can lead to sudden death. The awareness of this threat can easily lead to a panic attack patient. Agree, it is very difficult to distinguish the symptoms of cardiac dysfunction and symptoms of anxiety disorder. Although such patients is inevitable and very often subjected to hospitalization, but not such a simple survey, which we have already discussed - without ECG - is virtually impossible to distinguish the symptoms of a panic attack the symptoms of heart disease in patients with these types of diagnosis. Mitigating the attack panic attack in such cases administration of appropriate drugs and / or cognitive behavioral therapy.
• Physiological causes - we have already mentioned in passing them, but they deserve more detailed consideration.

Physiological causes

While some of the symptoms of panic attacks can create the feeling that the body no longer listen to you, in fact it is so protects itself from harm. First, quite often (though not always) the sudden fear causes small provoking stimuli in the body. There is a release of adrenaline, which causes the body to a state of readiness to escape from danger or when it is impossible to avoid, to combat it. Adrenaline Rush, in turn, causes an increase in heart rate (tachycardia), rapid breathing (hyperventilation), which may be perceived as shortness of breath, and sweating.

Such a reaction of the body needed to ancient man that during active movement (running or fighting) for the sake of his life muscles get adequate food. That is why it was necessary to shortness of breath, which ensures the supply of more oxygen and heart palpitations - to accelerate blood flow, carries oxygen. A sweating help avoid overheating during active movement.

But today, such a reaction of the body is almost never accompanied by increased human activity. Then hyperventilation leads to a drop in the level of carbon dioxide in the lungs and then into the blood. This causes a change in the chemical composition of blood and as a result, the occurrence of many other symptoms such as tingling or numbness in the limbs, dizziness, burning sensation in the body. Furthermore, adrenaline during a panic attack causes constriction of blood vessels, resulting in reduced blood flow to the brain, and it becomes cause dizziness.

As you can see, all the unpleasant sensations that occur during panic attacks, can be easily explained in terms of physiology. But if you do not know about it, you can very scared and decide that there is something really very serious, threatening your life.

Loneliness in old age: how to stay on the beans?

Contents:

• Old age as a vital step
• The reasons for the onset of loneliness in old age
• Loneliness in old age: the rate or rejection?
• How to deal with the loneliness of elderly people?

The youth did not really want to think about the problem of loneliness of elderly people. But from this it does not go anywhere. Even if you are now full of energy, and your life is reminiscent of a variety of cycling events of loneliness in old age, you are not insured. What causes it? How to avoid it? Read our article about loneliness in old age, and you will find answers to all their questions.

Old age as a vital step

Before we start talking about the problem of isolation of older people, it is necessary to determine the order that the general is aging. Many people associate this term with the phenomenon of menopause. Hormonal changes, causing changes in the physiology of the body and, of course, in a state of mind, does not go unnoticed: women experiencing menopause, become anxious and indecisive, irritable and pessimistic. Roughly the same thing happens with men who are not always successfully overcome a midlife crisis.

However, if poraskinut brains, it becomes clear that menopause and everything connected with it, passes, and here it comes, and old age. Scientists who have studied this period, it is isolated within a few steps of:

1. Transition state

   Usually it is associated with menopause. Predstarost covers the period from fifty to sixty years. You may notice that you are not so easily given the changes in life as a psychological flexibility begins to slowly decrease. Gradually the time is approaching retirement, which, despite the obvious his appeal turns severe stress. If you do not have any dreams, which do not always have the time, this leads to a surge of self-centeredness because of the increased need for communication with relatives (it is necessary to somehow occupy free time!)

2. Old age used to come into your life sometime after sixty or sixty-five

   Changes in lifestyle are becoming more dramatic, and health is increasingly making itself felt. Therefore you can receive the special needs in the diet, mode of the day, etc. ... Often, this leads to an increase in dependence on others as well as myself to satisfy them becomes difficult.

3. Impotence

   Fortunately, through this state are not all. Its onset is associated with the general decrepitude of the body, which leads to the inability to live independently and care for themselves. Severe chronic diseases are contributing to: for example, an elderly person paralysis of the lower limbs, and he loses the ability to walk.

How will you live in the twilight of his life? Primarily, it is necessary to adapt to changes in your mental processes. Seriously worsening memory of an elderly person becomes difficult to remember where he put his glasses or where lies the notebook. At the same time sensitive or emotionally intense events remain as fresh.

As we have mentioned above, decreased mental flexibility, which leads to problems in learning new things. That is why it is so hard to explain to your grandmother how to use a mobile phone (about the Internet is better to forget). Of course, this should not be a sentence: the world is full of elderly people who do not suffer from loneliness and old age with new passions and thirst for interesting things.

Thinking ability at this age also may worsen, but it can be influenced. In particular, the positive effect on the lack of intelligence of chronic diseases, adequate cost level of income, a good environment, a close relationship with her husband and children participate in activities requiring mental stress, and, of course, life satisfaction. This may seem strange, but the summary, it can be argued that happy people brain works better!

Your identity will not remain unchanged. The old sharpened many traits, such as irritability or meticulousness. The total level of vitality drops - the person becomes more calm and passive. Many old people there are such unique qualities as compliance, suggestibility and dependence on the opinions of others (or television speeches). That is why the elderly so often conducted to the tricks of swindlers.

The reasons for the onset of loneliness in old age

As you probably became clear, loneliness and old age - are not synonymous. At the same time, we can observe the following picture: more and more older people describe themselves as lonely. This is due to various reasons, including age-related changes. Therefore, interest in the loneliness of elderly people means coverage of this issue. So, what is the root of all evils?

• Reducing the number of items of interest to the person

  If youth and adulthood you been interested in the whole world, by the age range of the narrows. As we have mentioned, the elderly are less active, more conservative and rigid, not tolerate the changes and new developments in life. And it was all a source of vivid impressions and subsequently becomes a subject for dialogue!

• Personality changes

  It's no secret that the nature of many of the elderly is becoming unbearable. In old age, amplify different personality traits: grumpy man explodes on any smallest occasion, turns into a pedantic bore rare and alarming ceases to leave the house because of his many fears. Agree, it greatly complicates the prospects of dialogue with others.

• Mental disorders

  The human psyche undergoes certain age metamorphoses are not pleasant. The so-called age-related changes are in the deterioration of memory, attention, perception, reducing the speed of thought and reaction time. There are times when they go abroad the rules and pass in the category of mental disorders: Alzheimer's disease, dementia and various dementia, senile psychosis, etc. ... Of course, to deal with the mentally ill person becomes very problematic.

• The deterioration of family ties

  It narrows the range of human feelings elderly relatives - his emotions become more polar intermediate shades disappear. It can be updated old grievances, leading to a break contact with anyone from the family. Sometimes that love of an old man concentrates on any one family member, such as a daughter or grandson that leads to obsession to communicate.

• Objective loss of partners in dialogue - is another factor influencing the loneliness of the elderly

  The older a person becomes, the more likely to face the death of someone from friends or acquaintances. Either way, it narrows the range of communication, but because of personal and mental changes make new acquaintances, he is unable to.

• Retirement

  Work for an adult is the primary source of communication. During the long years of labor we get used to share with colleagues events in family life, impressions of travel, new classes, spend holidays together. After retirement, the amount of communication is sharply reduced, because you do not meet every day with these people.

• Specificity of communication

  Due to the reasons described above becomes a kind of conversation topics. You probably noticed that when appeared surrounded by old ladies in the transport or the clinic: the constant "sores" are often in the spotlight. In addition, elderly survivors in the life of a lot of negative events, often become angry and resentful at the whole world. In their speeches and betrays dissatisfaction with the modern way of life complaints, the government and other negativity. Thoughts of impending death is also not increase the number of people willing to chat with an elderly person.

Loneliness in old age: the rate or rejection?

Do not think about the loneliness of the elderly, as a natural phenomenon. In spite of the above reasons, an elderly person can adapt to age-related changes. There are factors that prevent the onset of loneliness in old age. For example, balance the nervous system blocks the formation of mental disorders, reduces the number of negative age-related changes in the psyche, and serves as the basis for a peaceful dialogue with the surrounding older person.

Much depends on the opinion of the elderly. For example, in the East decided to respect for elders - they are the progenitors, they have more life experience, which makes them wise in the eyes of the younger members of society. They listen to their opinion and all pay much attention to communication with them. With this in eastern countries and have not heard of such a problem as the loneliness of elderly members of society.

But even more important is the preservation of contacts with the family, it is this sphere of life is a source of resources and support for an elderly person. He was very important to feel the attention, warmth, love and care from relatives. And not necessarily to become a burden that can be frustrating for both sides. An elderly person can be engaged by simple household chores or sit with the child. Firstly, it is quite adequate activity for this age group and provides an opportunity for self-realization, which resulted from a grandparent appears self-confidence and self-esteem. Secondly, it will be actively involved in the family business, which in itself is the basis for communication.

Thus, the presence of imagination and ingenuity loneliness of older people cease to be for them something inevitable. At the same time a great deal in this matter depends on what type of psychological aging is susceptible persons. Psychologists describe a few of these options:

• "Grumpy" old age

  Surely you've encountered with this type of older people - they criticize everything that surrounds them: family, government, roads, hospitals, and even young mothers with prams. The only one who does not have the disadvantages - it myself croaker. And because he knows better than anyone how to live, he wants to share this knowledge with others, regardless of whether they want to or not. Very often the target of attacks have become young men. Typically, this option aging seen in those who initially have a tendency to aggressive behavior, and in old age, this feature increases. Sadly, this is how these people are asserting themselves.

• "Unlucky" old age

  Such old people can be seen from far away: the extinct eyes, hunched back, shuffling gait. The ever-present nagging question in one form or another. And all of these people are completely disappointed in life and in themselves, their self-image is reduced to the idea of ​​a lonely and sad loser. They are always regret missed opportunities, can not forgive their own mistakes, scolding and blaming themselves in insolvency. Memories of the darkest periods of life do not go out of their heads, and it makes these elders are deeply unhappy people.

• "Family" old age

  It is usually chosen grandmother. It is believed that the main purpose of a woman - to be a homemaker. After retirement grandmother turns to his family and takes on a variety of chores: cooking, clean up the apartment, gardening, sitting with his grandchildren. These things never come to an end, so the older woman always feels necessary and relevant. At the same time there is a perception that the household is not the true self-actualization, therefore, the level of happiness in people with this type of aging is slightly lower than that of the last two options, but more on that later.

• "Healthy" old age

  Because the average male life expectancy is much lower than that of women, he prefers to deal with this and to pension begins to actively take care of their health. Outwardly, this old man is very active, engaged in a variety of sports, adheres to a system of healthy food and loves to talk about these issues with the proponents of this lifestyle. The most important thing - to worry about the health of not acquired pathological character and turned into hypochondria. It is thanks to such cases clinics are full of people who are plaguing the doctors their real and imaginary complaints (the latter, of course, is more). In the normal version of these old people are quite satisfied with their lives.

• "Adaptive" old age

  Each of us is full of affairs and desires, which he for some reason do not have time to realize. And now comes the long-awaited retirement, involving a large amount of free time. An elderly person develops violent activities aimed at their own welfare, if finances allow, he has traveled extensively, visiting many interesting clubs and workshops, and even goes to the dance. Naturally, such a lonely life can not be called, so the level of satisfaction in this type of old age is quite high.

• "Creative" old age

  Some people can not be "retiring": they work until the last moment. The end of professional activity can be stressful for them, but they quickly found a replacement: non-governmental organizations, voluntary movements, political parties, mentoring - all these spheres allow an elderly person to actively participate in life and show creativity, passing their experience and knowledge of youth. Some psychologists doubt that this is a good option, choose it knowing in bad family relations. But such people are never alone and are quite happy living my life, and this is probably the most important thing.

How to deal with the loneliness of elderly people?

Thus, it can be argued that man himself is the blacksmith of his own happiness. Not necessarily to stay in their old age and loneliness in the twilight of his life - you can continue to communicate with other people and contact with the world under virtually any circumstances. What do I need to do?

Activity

In order not to be left alone in old age, it is important to stay active. As the majority of pensioners living in our country? All day sit at home and access to the clinic, store or gatherings on the bench considered something out of the ordinary. A man becomes passive, and the only way to get new experience - it is the hope that someone will come and do something. And this, unfortunately, is very rare.

Therefore it is very important to show interest and initiative in relation to its own activities - whatever it may be. Meet new people and talk is impossible only at home (if you are certainly not going to the guests) - in all other cases it is very likely. Especially when it comes to any group classes or clubs for older people.

Creation

The concept of "work" is quite extensive, and we understand them an opportunity for self-realization. This means that a man finds for himself some fun activity that brings him positive emotions and does not waste away from boredom. An elderly person can do their hobbies at home, but it is much more productive and more fun to do it in the company of senior citizens.

And yet, what to do in old age? Answers to this question can be mass. First of all, it is good to remember that you've always wanted to do, but you do not have enough time. Surely everyone has similar unrealized desires, for example, molding pottery or landscaping. Or maybe you already doing something interesting in his youth, and now it's time to recall these things. Drawing, making handicrafts, photography - the modern world provides plenty of opportunities for self-fulfillment, respectively, you can choose any of them.

Intellect

Features full communion may be severely limited if your thinking will begin to lose the usual edge. And you see, is much more interesting and pleasant to deal with an intelligent person who has a lot to learn. That is why it is so important to keep intelligence and other cognitive abilities at the right level.

To do this, arrange exercises for the mind: learn by heart verses, solve logic puzzles, train attention.

Character

Respect

How to resist the psychological pressure: the art to defend themselves

Contents:

• Feeling guilty
• Moral degradation
• Psychological pressure
• Distortion of information
• The impact on the thinking, perception and memory
• Direct threats

Imagine paradise, suddenly stepped on our sinful planet. What first strikes the eye? Surely change the relationship between people: all open, sincere and at the same time protective of the boundaries and the feelings of others. How wonderful it looks!

Unfortunately, the reality is far from ideal. In life, we are often faced with "barred" about our personality. They do not allow us to soberly assess the situation and confusing. As a result of their actions we allow other people to sit down our neck, we conclude unprofitable contracts and give inadequate promises. All of this - a consequence exerted psychological pressure on us.

Paradoxically, but often none of the participants in the communication process is not aware of what is happening. People using "prohibited methods" do it unconsciously, and the more it does not track the "victim". If this situation is familiar to you pain, then surely you are of it already tired. Accordingly, you will be interested to know how to learn to withstand the psychological pressure. Read our article and shakes on mustache.

Feeling guilty

How manipulators like to use it! It occurs in the human sense of guilt - a great excuse to get what you need from him. We feel guilty for many things: for the way of communication, lack of attention to other people, their lifestyle, their wants and needs, etc. ... Usually if you often experience this condition, it may speak of a special personal way of life, which provokes such experiences. No, of course you can try to be perfect for everyone, but it will take a lot of time and effort, but the result is very doubtful.

It is best to remember that absolute truth does not exist. So you're just as wrong in their behavior as the source - in their demands in relation to you. The same event can be perceived by partners in very different ways. This is often used by the manipulators.

In order to confront the psychological pressure with guilt, you should understand one thing: you have the right to be themselves and have their own desires and boundaries. That is, you almost do not owe anything to anybody. Separate the wheat from the chaff: draw a circle for itself the obligations which you voluntarily take the (care for the child or parent, the time given to friends, colleagues a little help), as well as their limits. Then it will be easier to focus on them when someone else is trying to get you to the desired behavior of him.

You can, of course, play up a little manipulator, but only then, to keep him quiet and did not increase the pressure. Then simply tell the other party "no." It is the most effective and efficient way to disown what you impose. Avoid any explanation at all - they give the manipulator hook, which can be hooked over and you begin to unwind. And do not forget to keep track of, in some moments include your guilt - most likely, they will be linked to your own personal weaknesses.

Moral degradation

The method, which is often used aggressive and personally handicapped people. They can not be grown-up to solve their problems and are beginning to humiliate those with whom they associate. This is manifested in the belittling of the social status, blow to the ego, switching attention to the important details on the subjective use of rhetorical questions.

In practice, such a strategy may look different. For example, a mother screaming at her child: "Do you even realize what you're doing! How can you be such an idiot! ". Or important negotiations, during which the opponent makes a remark about the stains on your clothes. The man who makes fun of the fullness of his partner. The mechanism of operation is quite simple: our attention is focused on their own inferiority, we cease to adequately monitor the situation and feel the desire to somehow "butter up" the interlocutor.

The first thing to do - think about why do people tell you things. You can ask him directly: "For what purpose did you announced? ". It is likely that he will not find what you answer, or starts talking all sorts of nonsense. When you become obvious that it is - one of the forms of psychological pressure, pull yourself together and say, "He's doing it on purpose to get me something. Therefore, it's not my disability and the inability of the partner to discuss their needs honestly and in an adult. I will not be upset by his words, and will focus on the really important for me at this moment things. "

Psychological pressure

As a rule, we rarely come across this method in everyday life. To this resort collection agencies, some unscrupulous lawyers and, of course, criminals. The massive psychological pressure is carried out when you start to influence, using all sorts of "strings": call your friends, relatives and acquaintances, know what you're doing, disrupt the negotiations and any other important events in your life.

Naturally, the people around you are constantly worried and tell you about these threats. It is necessary to reassure them, to explain the situation. And, of course, you should try to do everything you can to cease these actions: contact creditors or take crucial for someone decision. In any case, it is necessary to convey to the bad people that their actions only cause you anger and provoke action, counter-productive.

Reducing the distance may also be an element of psychological pressure. Each of us has his own personal space, which we are trying to protect from strangers. If the purpose of man - to confuse and fool you into thinking chaotically, the best way you can imagine. The solution is very simple - to define their borders and to move away from the person to a safe distance, letting him know that the reduction in distance is fraught with termination of the dialogue.

Distortion of information

Agree, it is much easier to make the right decision, having all possible information. And if someone is interested in the outcome of a lot more than the other, what would he do? That's right, to distort information. First of all it can be expressed in concealing certain facts and highlight your attention on others. Similarly, focusing on the work particular details, not the common main problem. In this case, it is very likely that such a reorientation will take you to a strictly defined decision that conceived the source.

Some people as decisive arguments tend to use all sorts of rumors and speculation spletki. For example, your friend tells you: "Why do you breastfeed after six months? The milk is still nothing useful left! ". And she herself immediately after the birth of the child transferred to artificial feeding, and if you do well, it will have no feelings of guilt. In an attempt to put pressure on you, it uses well-known myth about breastfeeding, which can really affect your decision.

But there are situations in which there is no clear and obvious boundaries. Often it concerns relationships between people. Human behavior is determined by many factors, and in trying to understand them, we often turn to the advice of friends. For example, you had a fight with the guy, and he picks up the phone. These actions can be interpreted in different ways, but a friend said, "What do you mean! Do not you love it - throw it! ". Agree, this is fairly easy to give in?

The yield in this situation is simple, but time-consuming - and carefully critical of the information provided by you. Do not hesitate to re-examine the facts that under the guise of truths teaches the people around you - among them full of myths and misconceptions. In difficult situations, try to listen to the views of experts: doctors, lawyers, psychologists, etc. ... And most importantly - try to rely on themselves and their opinions, because the only way you can live the most, and not on someone's orders.

The impact on the thinking, perception and memory

The psyche and its basis - the nervous system - the lady is very capricious. On their operation affects a lot of things, ranging from environmental parameters and ending with your moods, what sometimes try to take advantage of all sorts of unscrupulous manipulators. For example, a gypsy. They are overwhelmed with all of the channels of perception of different signals - noise, shake colored skirts, is touched - and you fall into a trance. As a result, there is a risk to remain without money, gold jewelry and other valuables - well, if their apartment is not empty! To counter this challenge, but there is a solution: run as fast, if you feel the use of this method in relation to itself.

The moment you somewhere in a hurry, or feel tired, are not ideal for making important decisions. If at this time someone tries to slip you to sign important papers or requires you any promises, boldly asking for his delay and explain that examine this issue in more suitable conditions. The same applies to the noise, the bustle, the stuffiness, and other varieties of unpleasant situation.

Direct threats

Typically, they are used when all else fails, a person has to get his. Typically, use this method of situation related to finance or government. Sometimes it can be an indication that a person is on its last legs and is willing to do anything to agree with you. A sort of "cornered rat." Go with him to compromise or not - you decide.

In any case, it is necessary to try to resolve the conflict as soon as possible by peaceful means, even if you have heard in your address direct threat. Try to discuss a speech with someone who is over the situation and is able to think clearly. It is possible that upon closer inspection, the threat is not worth a damn. And it is possible that you may indeed be pressured. In this case, you can decide - whether to stand on its final, involving all possible resources, or spit on it to make concessions. However, remember that those who at least once succumbed to the threats likely will continue to threaten the future.

In conclusion we can say that the best way to resist the psychological pressure - think clearly and to be vigilant. Avoid situations in which you would need to make the decision for you in uncomfortable conditions. And do not hesitate to put people in place. This does not mean that you should become embittered and fall into paranoia, but also need to love yourself and not give offense.

We strongly recommend to read: How to withstand the psychological pressure

How quickly forget the guy and move on in life?

Contents:

• As a break with boyfriend
• How to start a new life without ex-boyfriend

The problem with many women who, for one reason or another, recently broke up with my guys is that they can not get rid of the thoughts of a former lover. They think that it is now impossible to continue to live a normal life and even more so to find new happiness, because it will prevent still maintain a sense of him. It does not matter, it is the love, affection and resentment or even hatred. The main thing is that the thoughts keep coming back to break off relations.

Of course, one must admit that the breakup is always inflicts deep wounds, and at first it seems that deal with it and live on it is simply impossible. Healing emotional wounds can take a long time, especially if she was really in love with her boyfriend. Pain is inevitable.

You, too, are faced with a similar problem? We hasten to assure you that it can be solved quickly enough. We'll show you how to speed up the process quite simple actions. With our walkthrough, you'll be able to move forward without going through a period of grief and heading for a better world.

As a break with boyfriend

Let's start with an explanation of how to complete all relations with your ex. After all, you can not forget it, if you were at least some thread that is tied to your past you. Here's what you need to do is to remove everything that still holds you in place and does not move on:

• You must interrupt all possible contacts

  Your couple may have collapsed, but, like during the courtship of love, parting with a guy, too, has its own share of rituals. It is not enough simply to end the relationship; you must stop all contacts, however difficult it may seem. Remove his number from his cell phone, and remove it from friends in all social networks, remove it from the list of contacts in Skype. It's tough, but it must be done. Be constantly aware of what is happening in the life of ex-boyfriend, it will be for you a very difficult test. You can not resist the temptation and will constantly look at his page, and it will turn out your soul. And forget the guy you never fail.

• In no case do not show him that you are in pain

  Now this is especially important. People are a little cruel, no matter how good they are. If your ex-boyfriend will know that you are suffering, it is only flatter his ego and make him stronger emotionally. And to you, he will be treated with a share of neglect. Therefore, keep a calm expression on his face, as if to hurt you any. In no case do not cry with him and did not say how much you miss him. His response or behavior only cause you more pain. Avoid meetings with him and try to make everything that he thought that you are quite happy and satisfied with their lives. This, incidentally, is capable of much intriguing guy, and certainly not in any case in this situation of affairs, he does not feel his advantages over you.

• Stay away from your common friends, especially if they were initially friends Your Man

  Again, you will be hard to distance itself from the former lover, if you go there, where you can meet him. Yes, and I do not know which side to hold your common friends. And in general, to communicate with them to bring you only the painful memories, and they themselves might try to start a conversation about breaking your relationship. In addition, you somehow start to get news from them about how he spends his time. All this will eventually lead to the fact that your start was delayed wounds begin to bleed again. And the worst part is that he will be able to know exactly (from friends), how hurt you now. So now your best bet is just to hang out with their friends.

• Get rid of anything that hinders you to forget about his past love

  In the months or years that you have spent together, you both did a lot of gifts to each other and kept some memorable things for you. This is all you need if you do not destroy (although it would be preferable), at least to remove as far as possible. Otherwise you will take the time to sort out his love letters preserved or tickets to the movies that you have watched together, hugging each other and holding hands tenderly. All this will not be easy to hurt you; it can serve as a fact that will make memories with new force to break out your love. A novel that will have a one-way ... you this completely useless, is not it you will never forget her boyfriend; But you do not just want to forget, but to do it quickly, right?

• Avoid being alone

  Perhaps you are now experiencing a strong desire to hide in some dark corner and sit there alone with myself, experiencing a storm in his soul. Everything fell apart, life is over, happiness is impossible ... But why sit in the corner, pouting when you can chat with friends, make new acquaintances, to do something interesting - to live a full life, in short! We all want to look inward when something hurts us; but you really have to convince yourself to leave the house, or occupy himself in some affair. Loneliness - the greatest obstacle to your "recovery" and the beginning of a new life.

• Flirting with other guys!

  During the time that you were in a relationship with her ex around you were a lot of guys who might like you. You yourself may have noticed that the guys flirting with you when your boyfriend was not around. But before you were connected, because you have certain obligations to your favorite. Now everything is different. You can pay attention to those guys who are looking to communicate with you. Believe me, any of them can make you feel like a princess! And you deserve it. And eventually you will have a good time, rather than to sit and mope in solitude.

• Connect with new people

  Your old friends know that you had to leave with her boyfriend, and you will, willy-nilly, to keep the brand in front of them, trying to show that everything is in order. Meeting new friends who do not know about what happened, you can totally relax and be myself. In the end, you do not have to constantly inflame the memories and unpleasant conversation on the topic, and you will be able to forget her ex-boyfriend is much faster.

How to start a new life without ex-boyfriend

You've already made several successful efforts to forget ex-boyfriend and drown the pain that you caused the separation. But this is not enough, because now you have to somehow rebuild their lives and start a new path to happiness.

Use your freedom for their own benefit

When you are in a relationship, whatever you do, you do it as a couple. Although it is a good idea, but eventually you might miss a lot of things that you like. All people have different tastes and desires, and what pleases one may leave completely indifferent another. And to give, as a rule, most often it is to us girls. So maybe, you really have stopped going to the theater, because your boyfriend prefer going to a movie, or did not have the opportunity to listen to the music that you like, or you can not communicate with your favorite friend as often as you wanted them ...

Now, when you dispose of them and their free time in its sole discretion, you can do whatever your heart desires. Watch those movies that you like, plenty to read books, wrapped in a blanket and sitting in your favorite chair, make new fans go to knitting all day hanging out with a friend - whatever you like to do so before. The whole world in your hands, and there are so many cute and funny things that are waiting just for you! So why not waste time and depressed, locked in his room?

Do not let the past interfere in date

Now that you have done so much to forget the guy you should feel much safer and even more fun. But you should understand that full recovery has not yet occurred, and still have to avoid memories. The worst thing happens if you stay alone, even very briefly. This is the time when you'll still be thinking back to her former boyfriend.

You will be very difficult to resist the temptation to call or write to him. Every time you feel a desire to call someone from new friends who do not know and your past relationships, and even better - another guy who flirts with you and trying to please you (because you also listened to our advice and do not prevent currently flirting with other guys?) Within a few minutes on the phone to communicate your mood will change dramatically for the better.

If you do not hold, and allow yourself to call a friend to the former, it is thus show him his weakness. You can also give him a chance to gloat, and he will at every opportunity to humiliate you. You are in no case should not allow this, because it will hurt your heart even more. So the next time your mind back to the ex-boyfriend, chase them away from your head! And try not to be alone. And if you still want to be alone, make sure you occupy yourself some business.

The first steps towards a new relationship

If you want to find a new guy, then there is nothing better than visiting clubs and parties. Collect all your best friends and get out of them in the town red! Now you can behave, they could not, being someone's girlfriend. Dance with everyone! You see a handsome guy? Well, flirt with him! Laugh, joke, build eyes, flirting! Enjoy your freedom!

Just do not forget our main caution in this regard - in any case do not get drunk at a party. Drink is not worth very little: a recent break with former lover and alcohol can be a very dangerous combination. In the end, you can spend the night with a guy who does not like you, or you lose control and start to worry Memories and comes in sobs, instead of having fun and making new acquaintances. And even if all this does not happen, the feeling of a hangover the next morning will make you forget how much fun you had a great time the night before.

New relationship

If you did all the things mentioned above, but the relief did not come, and you still feel that your heart is broken, then maybe you should do a "horse course". To quickly forget the old, you have to start a new relationship. Now many would advise you to wait with this, and not to start dating, they say, with the first comer, but we think differently.

Most of the girls are afraid to enter into a new relationship, because they fear that once again fall in love again and will eventually suffer. But you are our dear, if true love is destined to happen, it's bound to happen! If in a relationship with a new boyfriend love is born, it is also not a disaster. Then just enjoy the fact that you are not alone. Your new partner will make you much more quickly forget about those relationships that were destroyed and tormented you so far.

Of course, you should be honest with her new admirer. If feelings for him you do not, you can just tell him that it is not looking for something serious and just want to have fun a few weeks or months. And there will be seen - perhaps because your friendship is born a true mutual love!

Exit the game winner

Now we will tell you the last thing to be aware of a break with ex-boyfriend, if you really want to be a winner, not a loser. Winners always triumph, and the losers - are suffering. If you're after breaking up you ask your friend to come back, or if you call him constantly and rolls scandals, crying and shouting, it makes you look weak. And he never wanted more than to deal with such hysterical. Especially the relationship with you for a guy to lose all value if it sees that you are ready for anything, so you crave to be with him. The realization that you are so madly in love with him, flatters his ego and gives him the strength to move on. And this will make you weaker and will only make fall in love with this guy even more!

Man, however, that after parting looks quite cheerful, and has the advantage of experiencing the disintegration of relationships is much easier than the one who is crying and moping. It is a psychological advantage. So, if you keep a happy face and a lot of fun, never letting her ex-boyfriend to see how much pain you have inside, you'll surely be able to move on very quickly forget it! Taking the right way, you get the right to freedom and a new life. And very soon you'll wake up with the feeling that you - the happiest man in the world!

We strongly recommend to read: How to flirt with guys Pen

How to get rid of loneliness within a month

Contents:

• Loneliness: A variety of treatments
• 10 most common causes of loneliness
• Do not be alone - just!

Despite the bad weather, the calendar has long spring. Every girl, thinking about this period, dreams of one thing - a great and beautiful love. But for some reason it does not come. And millions of girls grieve, not knowing how to get rid of loneliness. If you are among them, it is possible for you, our paper will be key, opens the door to a new happy life.

Loneliness: A variety of treatments

The phenomenon is discussed loneliness people ever times when they became interested in the question of the human soul and personality. For some, it is embodied in the absence of a life partner, someone thinks lonely people who have few friends, and other people understand loneliness under special state of mind that does not depend on the intensity of contact with others.

What do think about it, psychologists? Followers of the great Sigmund Freud offered us to distinguish between concepts such as privacy and solitude. In the first case we are talking about the normal "state of mind", arising from the lack of someone in our surroundings. Loneliness is a constant insurmountable condition associated with the presence of the nature of egocentrism, narcissism and hostility. The roots of this, as a rule, are deep in my childhood, when a child is very great need for closeness with their parents, which for one reason or another are not satisfied.

Psychologists who believe each person unique and unrepeatable, believe lonely people who find themselves in a world without their usual psychological defenses. For example, a man all his life angry at the other, and because of this he did not remain friends. He knew it, and abandoned his usual demeanor, at the same time being in a very vulnerable position. He feels that he is unworthy of love and good relationships with others. It is the fear that now will be painful, making the experience of loneliness so acute.

It is believed that there is no universal definition of loneliness. Everyone lives differently this state, and no one can do it for another. At the same time, for most people the feeling of loneliness has some common features, such as totality, integrity and inclusiveness. It is characterized by full immersion in itself. Precisely because of this you gain any new knowledge about his own soul. Otherwise it is impossible to get them if you are constantly in contact with anyone.

In today's world, people often feel lonely. Large areas of megacities, it would seem, should keep it - but no! On the contrary, in a crowd, a person feels lonely more and more often. Sociologists attribute this to the weakening of various groups, such as family or housemates. If before we knew almost all of those who are close to us, is not to hear "hello" from passing close friend - not such a rarity. We used to stay in their own homes, in the sink, not seeing and not knowing anyone around and not feeling the need to communicate with them.

10 most common causes of loneliness

The feeling of loneliness is directly linked to our emotional state. In the end, that prevents a person to enjoy the best of its freedom and independence to enjoy their own happiness? But it does not at all. Often we are faced with their own nervousness, sadness and annoyance to the whole world. This is especially true for women who do not have the man she loved. Before you figure out how to get rid of feelings of loneliness, you must understand the reasons for his cause.

1. Diffidence

   Very often you can not tell the reason for which you feel lonely. In this case, most likely, it is within you. If a woman feels insecure, she just can not adequately present themselves when meeting with a man. The feeling of inferiority may interfere with it open. Of course, because it will be very ridiculous and absurd, if you smile, or, God forbid, make a joke! It is clear that each person has the objective shortcomings - for example, you no longer take care of yourself, and your figure is "broke" - and imagined. So, it's time to stop worrying about the past! Forgetting about them, you get the opportunity to meet a worthy companion and new friends.

2. Pomeshannost on any one topic

   There are things that are worth discussing exclusively with women: clothing, footwear, beauty, baby diapers and unfaithful husbands. Sure, you can talk with a friend or your boyfriend a new system of a healthy diet that you liked - it is possible that it was in his face you will find a kindred spirit. But daily conversations on the same topic are able to "destroy" the brain to any sensible man. They are much more interesting to do or try something rather than spend hours discussing the finer nuances of fashion trends this year. And even more so it is not necessary to tell them how much your new dress!

3. The narrow circle of friends

   You will not go and did not want to do in order to communicate with people around you. The choice, of course, is yours, but if you withdraw only herself and her apartment, nothing good will come of it. Virtually no one is interested "wiggle" a man who himself does not want anything. Judge for yourself, would call for the tenth time in a cafe girlfriend who refused had nine meetings? Surely not. How do we get to communicate, if you do not aspire to it? Maybe it's the natural laziness or timidity, but overcame them, you can learn how to get rid of loneliness.

4. World

   If you think of all the people on Earth by evil, it is not surprising that they do not want to talk to you! No one is interested in a man who sees everything in black light and believes that man is a wolf. The same applies to relationships with men: if you think they are all ranked as cattle, then so be it.

5. Assertive

   Contact point of view, too, does not bode well. People often get scared when they see excessive insistence on communion. They think that it is hidden in a trick, and of the "initiator" they see is not in a favorable light. Especially the men: for them the discussion on the third date details of the wedding and the names of the future potential of children like death.

6. Narcissism

   Communicate with Zaznayka not interested in a soul. The man likes to feel their own importance, and if he does not, then he becomes sad. What do you think will be your partner to seek a man who brings a fellowship with some disappointment and frustration in yourself? That's right, no. It's great that you are so beautiful and smart, but that's other people also want to feel your status.V relationship between a man and a woman it usually manifests itself in excessive expectations on the part of the partner: a white limousine, expensive restaurants, recreation on the islands and hundreds of bouquets Rose - are capable of only a few, but their human qualities remain a mystery. Therefore, for your own sake it is useful to find a balance between self-esteem and attitude to the people around you.

7. Sharp tongue

   Almost no one likes sharp and venomous jokes about his own person. Indeed, everyone can find fun and ridicule the lack of it, but why do it consistently? People are beginning to be embarrassed by this, nervous, leave the state of mental balance and do anything to escape from you. Especially such a course of conduct does not like men - they want to be winners in the women's eyes, and here you have them "drown" in the stupid comments!

8. Overprotective

   Every woman is hidden within the most powerful force known as maternal instinct. But in some cases, especially when you do not have your children, you begin to distribute their care and attention to all the people around you. It looks at least strange. For example, men want to see your face in a passionate lover, a good company and a good friend, a good mother, and they have enough at home. Do not stand on this slippery slope!

9. Lack of time

   You spend a huge amount of effort into, to make a career? It is commendable, but you probably noticed how your colleagues leave from work at six to meet with friends or family, and you are after ten o'clock at night crawling home, where you except a cat, no one is waiting. Talking to people - an important part of everyone's life, and if you find it difficult to be spontaneous in this issue, use their business skills - separate plan gatherings with her friends or searching for the gentleman himself.

10. Fear of pain

    That pain makes us avoid what caused it in the past. This is quite a normal process, aimed at preserving life, but that's between people it can create a lot of inconvenience. But, first, getting rid of the communication, you can not know the genuine joy that it is able to give. Secondly, it is not necessarily what will hurt you again. Yes, it is possible, but nothing ventured, nothing gained!

Do not be alone - just!

More precisely, it is not so - absolutely everyone can understand for themselves how to get rid of loneliness. In any case it is necessary to change something in your life, as the original version of it has led you to frustration.

Fear of being alone is capable of quite significantly increases the severity and depth of immediate experiences. Think of how much is spent on resources! Own fenced off from the public as soon as it seems many times worse and scarier than it actually is. Yes and no pleasure from the privacy you will not be able to receive.

Accordingly, it is first necessary to understand how to get rid of the fear of loneliness. To do this, think about what it all means to you, and develop until the end of the logical chain. For example, loneliness - this is when there is nobody in his old age to bring a glass of water, that is, do something to help. Or loneliness means that you - the inferiority of women, since nobody wants to marry you. All of these ideas will help you understand what you are afraid of solitude and perhaps some of them will seem absurd.

Next, you need to deal with old grudges that hinder you to communicate with people. Sounds, of course, a bit strange, but surely they are in your life. Even if you tried to forget them, they can hide deep in the soul, and from there to harm your life. To appreciate this, consider what your main problem in dealing with people. Identify it and think about whether there was a long time ago the situation in which the problem had to be a place for the first time and which would have severely injured? If you can remember something like that, chances of psychological transference, which determines your perception of others. Simply put, instead of being a real person in a real relationship, you start to think and see in communion with him something bad, then the contact is cut off. Or you begin to behave as if trying to resist the offender from the past.

What to do? Good question. First of all, you must allow yourself to worry about traumatic situation. Our feelings are often slowed down with all sorts of social attitudes such as "there is nothing to suffer because of any nonsense" or "poobizhalas, and that's enough - it's time to forget and move on." Because of this you do not live until the end of the situation, not to let her go.

Next, try to imagine the person with whom you are related traumatic experiences, sitting in front of you on an empty chair. Look carefully at his face, look at the gestures and posture. What do you want to say to him? If the head stupor, try to remember a time when you have suffered because of him, and tell him a little about his feelings. Rather, the language you unleash. Express empty chair all the thoughts that you have scrolled over the years in the head in an internal dialogue. You can even scream, break a plate or pad to attack. Well, if you have the opportunity to express their emotions in the human reality, use it - and be amazed how much your life will change after some time.

A week after the previous exercise equipment start using positive thinking. As we know, the universe responds to our messages in relation to it. Accordingly, you need to tune in to the fact that everything will be fine. Every day repeat itself several times the following things:

• Around me a lot of interesting people;
• I am full of kindness towards people;
• I find it easy to get acquainted with nice people;
• When I talk with another person, I feel the warmth and joy;
• I feel confident;
• I am full of strength and energy to communicate;
• I'm ready to love and be loved;

However, in order not to be unfounded, use strategic planning: where, when and how you will communicate with people. When it comes to friends and acquaintances, take the time to organize theme parties. When it comes to dealing with men, then think through in detail the places where the easiest way to "pick up" you are interested in the subject. Keep your look in perfect condition: go to the gym, do hair and nails, wear nice clothes. Make a list of qualities and manners that are popular with men, and try to get used to the image. Just do not forget that it must be authentic to you, meaning you should be comfortable in it. It can be your opposite, but only if it causes you concern, rather than disgust and the desire to escape.

Remember that happiness in relationships with other people is almost entirely dependent on your inner state. You need to take responsibility for what happens to you. It is useless to lament the fact that you have with anyone does not work, and a neighbor Masha tired to fend off fans. Rather, it is sincerely and effectively in their manifestations, but not fenced off from the whole world of loneliness wall. One has only to want to - and you will go beyond it and be happy surrounded by the closest and most pleasant person.

We recommend that read: Loneliness - Causes

Women's clothing on sale spring 2014

Sale brand clothing on KupiVip.ru

Throughout the world, even the rich and wealthy fashionistas await season of sales and big discounts, because it is the best way to update your wardrobe and to buy new stylish and high-quality stuff at the lowest prices. All clothing stores, including the most pretentious and expensive boutiques in Italy, France, England and Germany, during the global sell-crowded buyers.

Not surprisingly, throughout the world, regardless of gender and age, and the students, and world stars rush to the stores with bright inscription «Sale». Everyone knows that this is where you can buy fashionable clothes, shoes and accessories at discounted prices from 50% to 90%.

Sales of clothing - it is an integral part of the marketing modern clothing stores. First of all, this course allows you to sell items left for sale from the previous collection, to make room for items from the new collection. Second, it's a great chance to "roll" and make popular your store or brand, attracting customers with cheap prices, with bright labels on display and advertising.

If stores, malls and boutiques satisfied with the sale of their goods once a season or on special occasions, we offer year-round Sale of any of our products. Our multi-brand online store KupiVip.ru specializes in selling quality clothing only the best manufacturers and famous brands at the best discounts.

Even before expensive and trendy branded stuff you could not afford, with us you will not stay away from the latest fashion trends of the season. Now you can buy the best things at very low prices.

You will be pleasantly surprised by our vast selection of brand-name items, shoes, fashionable and original accessories, and other high-quality original products. Every day in our Sale online store is updated assortment of products from more than a thousand manufacturers, currently represented by 10 thousand brand new things.

You also will enjoy our regular sales and an incredibly low prices and high quality of service in our shop. After an order at our site in the shortest time we deliver your new thing right in your hands, in what city you are.

Sign up on our website, join our private sales club and get favorable discount coupons for quality clothing, shoes and accessories from the best manufacturers. For any questions, you can contact our customer service which is active 24 hours a day, seven days a week. We will be glad to see you among our customers.

Eldredge Knot - a way to tie a tie really elegant

Contents:

• Node Eldridge: whom he will approach
• Step by step instruction execution

If you like to wear ties, and at the same time refined and elegant look, try to tie a tie is not the traditional way, and the node Eldridge.

This method is one of the most chic, elegant and original, so always attracts the attention of others. That is why it is suitable for people bold, stylish and seeking to stand out from the crowd, but in any situation and the situation look well-groomed and elegant. It is also noteworthy that the way to tie a tie will suit both men and women. For detailed instructions on how to tie a tie knot Eldridge, you will find below.

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Node Eldridge: whom he will approach

This type of assembly is one of the most elegant and beautiful. Outwardly, it resembles a Christmas tree. Apply it is possible and in business style, but provided that you have at work is not too strict dress code. It is also ideal for those people who work hard to dress code, but it does not apply to accessories. Blindfolded so that the accessory will bring zest and variety of image business person, as business suits are usually sewn from fabric restrained colors.

If the office style does not allow such delights, the node Eldridge - great for a corporate party or any celebration, including your own wedding! If you are going to a celebration, do not forget that it is the main "highlight" of your outfits and try not to overload the image of other items, the ability to "kill" it. Thus tying a tie is better monotonous and preferably made of natural silk. The bright colors will distract attention from the node itself, and after all it was chic in it.

As mentioned, this option is perfect for both men and women. Moreover, it will give a chic woman, emphasize the graceful long neck and soften the image of the strict business woman, emphasizing femininity. Women can also experiment using for this purpose not tie a silk scarf: too can get quite exquisitely.

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Step by step instruction execution

At first glance it may seem that to tie a tie knot Eldridge difficult, but if you follow the steps below, be sure you will succeed! The main thing - do not rush and precisely follow the recommendations. If suddenly you have something does not work, do not worry, it's an art.

Detailed instructions:

1. Choose the right tie: monochromatic colors and made of natural silk. This color can be calm and bright: most importantly, that there is no pattern.
2. Hang it on the neck as usual.
3. Place the wide end of the tie at the height you need.
4. Cross your wide and narrow ends.
5. Pass the narrow part downwards behind the general. You should get a loop.
6. Pass through a narrow part of the loop and tighten the knot so that the end of the tie "looked" in the direction.
7. Now the narrow end of the scratch with the primary node in a horizontal position and pass through the loop in the direction away from you.
8. Again tighten the knot, and the narrow part should be downward and to the side.
9. Around the wide end of the tie another knot, tightened towards the side and up.
10. Spend a narrow part around the "neck".
11. Circle tie around the "neck". This again is to form a loop.
12. Thread the tie in the loop in the direction of the opposite side and down.
13. Now hold the narrow end of the front and thread into a loop.
14. Tighten the knot and hide the narrow end.

Step by step instructions will allow you to quickly master this method. Even better, you will be if you will follow two rules. First, tie, you want to engage in this way, to be quite long. And secondly, the most important thing - immediately align the length of the wide end, so how you wear it. Since all the manipulations you spend with a narrow part of the length of the wide portion will remain unchanged. So you do not have to redo it all over again, if you suddenly notice that the main length of the tie you end up not satisfied.

Information about the sites - aggregators promotional codes

Internet shops - an alternative to ordinary boutiques in which every girl is quite often. Perhaps someone still afraid to order, fearing that the cards will act with more money than expected or will not the same size. For these ladies declare that have created numerous resources with reviews where people actually bought items from online stores, shared details about the size, quality, and how the quality justify the price. That price will be discussed in the article, as buying in online stores can be even cheaper, simply by using coupons!

Consider one of the most popular trading platforms - brand clothes, shoes and accessories Quelle. The brand has been around for a long time together with the site on which people can place orders. For many, this seems to mark an inexpensive and accessible, but for those who have to pay and the cost (remote regions), so can not be considered. For them and other citizens of the country-specific sites were invented kuponatorami discounts. So, quelle promotional code can be obtained, for example, on gdekod.ru, because this site has collected a large number of coupons and promotional codes to offer many online stores.

So, websites, kuponatory started its existence since the founding of "online" marketplaces and immediately liked the set of buyers. The fact is that almost everyone wants to purchase goods at a discount not to overpay for such extra charges like VAT or paid delivery. Gdekod.ru provides its customers with so many different promotional codes that they can use as a discount on goods. The whole system is necessary to, first of all, to agitate more people to make purchases from online stores, as some experts even see the near future in this. Agree with them or not - it's up to everyone, but the fact that customers themselves would be much easier to make purchases - a proven fact!

In general, if you do decide to order products from the catalog in the online store or not, reread the article and read the site-kuponatorom. Perhaps it will push you to a discount of close friendship with trading platforms, operating mode "online" and you will be one of those who can, and can be ordered on the Internet. Successful purchases and larger discounts!